My imaginary son Cuauhtemoc Mohammed Oleandlena Jelf and I have been busy in the workshop developing my new product which will revolutionize the Model T world.
The E-Waterpump
So far all it does is sling coolant around the engine compartment and give you a big shock if you touch it. But I've been thinking of adding modern computer technology to it so it will perform all sorts of random and infuriating functions for no apparent reason.
Steve-
When will these be available?
Great idea but you will have to think of another name for it as I believe another Model T guy has already trademarked the term "E-Waterpump" as well as has "E-Steering", "E-Suspension" and "E-Babbit".
I'm very busy, so I'll have to find someone to manufacture them for me. R.V.? Royce? Stan?
Steve:
Bad marketing plan.
If you had these out before 2012 Christmas you may have been a millionaire by now!
Perhaps a red and green spark plug wire can be you 2013 Christmas issue?
It's a self-motorized cool water energizer with startup ionizing decalcifier. Eliminates need for radiator, fan belt, and anti-freeze. Saw one on eg-bay.
Steve
Good to have another T-inventor at work.
Last year saw the intro of my work...
Soft-T-Crank handle cushion
.....aimed at eliminating the hazardous and life maiming of all T parts....the hand crank.
Patent license is avail for sale from my Washington D.C. attorney,
Mr. Sneerly Bitemore, ESQ.,ASPCA,PETA
Will there be a 14MM version?
you have to buy the adapter for that
Please send you Washington D.C. attorney to the White House, so they get their business done!
As seen on TV? Does it come with a hat? All good products as seen on TV come with a hat. I'm not interested unless it comes with a hat.
Take it to the Shark Tank!
Mr Steve Jeff
I have the part that you require in your advert and will supply it at your earliest convenience. In addition I would like to order 3000 units at a pre determine price however due to the recent death of his enormousness, Phatious Flatulous the Secretary of the Treasury for Modateescambia the funds of 12,000,000 will not be available until the new government is in place. If you can please send me 300,000.00 USA dollars and I will forward you the endorsed bank note for 12,000,000. All remaining funds are yours to keep after the transaction is complete. You may deal directly with my barristers Dewey, Cheatem & Howe
I think you gave at least a half a dozen guys heart attacks Steve. And at least another 6 went for their wallets. I'm officially re-nameing this statuette as the Steve Jelf Award for Model T excellence.
Do we get 2 for the price of one for only $19.95 'not counting separate shipping and handling' (of an extra $300.) ;-) ;-)
Have one like that on my 16 T but it is attached to temp. gauge on my dash.
Of coarse it will have to pass Gov.Moonbeam's Kalifornia Air Quality Regs. and also be compatible to use in conjunction with state mandated 3 Phase Catastrophic Converters already in use here.
Why an electronic version when the hydraulic one worked just as poorly for all these years?
As an expert I'd like you to know that your wiring is not correct it should be reversed, just noticed it thought you'd like to know
In lieu of the spark plug, you could install an E-temperature gage in the water outlet and have a very marketable product. The E-temperature gage could be mounted in a E-panel with an E-Ammeter and E-Magneto meter and an E-gas gage. I would suggest you use the profits from the first 117 E-temperature gages to develop the E-panel assembly which could marketed in 2014.
Has the EPA certified it as acceptable for the coal burning Model T's yet?
This is pitiful... The Jelf Meister has finally gone round the bend! So sorry to see this happen...likely the Royce syndrome has finally has reached it's apex! So sad, so sad!
Steve, if it'll work on a mag only car, I'll volunteer to be a beta tester. But, I'm not putting any battery powered gadgets on my '14.
WWRD?
What Would Ronco Do?
Steve, if you replaced the plug with a temperature sensor and wired it to either an electric motor to drive the pump, or to an electric fan behind the radiator, you might sell more.
I am just laughing. Speechless. (Now you know what to do when I start ranting!)
Happy New Year all!
I always thought I had a sence a humor, I geuss this is funny?? Or am I the only one that finds this just a little disrespectful. If I spent as much time thinking up , designing,and testing and trying to market product I think I would be pissed off. This is disrespectful. Give the guy a break.
Steve,
I think you have had too much Egg Nog!
Now, I know where all these jokes come from that show up on the internet. LOL
I know that time flies when we get older, but has April 1st come already?
Now, if you could only figure out how to get a Clapper integrated in your design................
I lean towards disrespectful.
"Remember, if the ladies don't find you handsome, at least they can find you handy" or words to that effect. Now lets head downstairs for the men's meeting.......Pass the eggnog....
Will that thing pump eggnog?
And when you buy this item you will get a free potato peeler and driveway leaf blower if you call in the next 10 minutes. Operators are standing by to take your call.
I have to admit that Steve has developed some of the best red rubber hoses I have ever seen. They compliment the those brown hose clamps and the greasy thingy with the wire.
On top of all that I can tell that he has made a 5 cylinder cylinder Model T because there is an extra spark plug. That should give the 4 vs 6 cylinder discussion guys a place to compromise.
If that is a sparkplug as it looks to be, it won't spark with water in the cooling system. If you drain the cooling system, the spark will only make it run hotter.
However, that might be a water pump or thermostat which just looks like a sparkplug.
What is it? and how does it work?
Norm
Hilarious! Down right HILARIOUS!
I have that exact same waterpump in my garage. Will you be selling parts or only complete sets of the above E-waterpump? Can I purchase this item from Mike Kosser along with an e-timer and an ECCT and receive a discount? Do you get free shipping if you purchase all three items at the same time? Thank you.
I am expecting a nice refund after I file my taxes, so the funds are available.
Bill, Your clapper is a sound idea. It rings a bell but I can't remember why. Oh yeah, I have to go visit the crapper for a little tinkle.
Gary - Ya missed a letter or two between Clapper and Crapper but that is understandable if you went to the crapper and the clapper got your twinkler.
I hope you don't see stars while your twinkling
Do I have to install a 5th coil to power the e-waterpump or a distributor ?
Oh Oh. Now were gonna get it, "waterpump" and "distributor" in the same post. Alarms are ringing somewhere!
Good post Steve ! (Err - you were serious .......right?)
After some thinking and reviewing various devices on the internet, I think Steve's invention just might be modified to generate enough hydrogen to fill the Hindenburg. That is if all the claims are true.
John, the invention isn't necessary. This thread proves that the forum can generate plenty of gas on its own.
Yeah and I'd say it's all natural gas, Steve...
Hydrogen? Has Steve built the prototype for a self-fueling engine? Can this device produce enough hydrogen to power a T?
What will we with our 26-7 T's do? Will there be an in-hose style available?
Yep, Steve "Sparky" Jelf.
This sounds like an invention a former neighbor of mine had. He called it his "Trinity" car. The car would have the traditional gasoline engine, but it would be allowed to run hot to generate steam to run a steam engine. Thereby using all the wasted energy which goes out in the cooling of the gas engine. Then he put a generator on the wheels to generate electricity whenever the car was coasting or slowing down thereby using the wasted energy from slowing or stopping. This generator would also run as an electric motor when accelerating. So all three means of propulsion were utilized to the maximum. This was a concept. Some parts of this are actually being used in "hybrid" cars of today.
Norm
If you fill the radiator with gasoline doesn't it blow the hose off when the spark plug fires??
Mark, I'm fairly certain, although not positive, that Steve has used a liberal amount of Modified Bitumen Roofing Tar in the construction of his apparati to reduce the possibility of that occurrance.
You Guys are being a little ruff on Steve here....He may have stumbled on to something here...You need to look at percentages here.....If it only does 10% of what he wants it to do,he has a "Gold Mine Product" to market....My father worked for the Santa Fe (AT&SF Rlwy as a Machinest.....One of his co-workers stocked up on little fuel saving "gadgets" from the J.C.Whitney catalog ....A % here ,,a% there,,,it all added up...The only problem was he over did it installing them on his Model A he drove to work......He did'nt do the math and put too many on the car,,,,,you can imagine what happened when he went over the 100% Limit......While on Vacation he drove to the High Sierras for a fishing trip...About 247 Miles from home the gas tank overflowed on him....It was a mess,,what to do with all that extra gas........Right on the side of the highway he took about 12 or 13 of those parts off and the "Problem" was solved......That's how I heard it......
A good laugh Carl but here's a legit tale: As a kid working at a gas station in the 60's in Brooklyn a customer came in with a box full of that stuff. He had the fuel line magnets, a disc shaped thingy that was supposed to smooth out fuel pump pulses and a clear plastic distributor cap. All "designed" to improve fuel mileage & power. He wanted them installed pronto. He left two streaks on the sidewalk, one from each rear cheek when the boss threw him out and was quickly followed by his box of magic.