OT. Model A joke

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Model T Ford Forum: Forum 2013: OT. Model A joke
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert E. (Bob) Blackbourn, Gautier Ms. on Tuesday, November 12, 2013 - 12:42 pm:

A citrus orchardist was having a good season and decide he needed more help. He put a "help needed" sign out on the roadside. Next day a woman applies for the job. After reading her resume the orchardist says "You have a very impressive resume ma'am but your Masters degree in business administration and being a Certified Public Accountant does not really help me. I am looking for someone who can pick lemons".
The woman said "Well, my first husband was impotent, my second husband was arrested while trying to hold up an ATM with a gun, and my third husband ran off with my best friend's husband".
"Well ma'am", said the orchardist, "that doesn't help much"
"OH, and I bought a Model A" she added.
"Can you start tomorrow" he asked


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Richard Wolf on Tuesday, November 12, 2013 - 07:38 pm:

Citrus trees are grown in a grove. LOL


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert E. (Bob) Blackbourn, Gautier Ms. on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 11:37 am:

According to Webster's dictionary grove is indeed an alternate word. I grew up in New Zealand where the climate permits growing both apples and oranges in the same orchard. One variety of apple was called "Cox's orange". We also grew plums, peaches and nectarines and "Chinese gooseberries" which is a vine. We were still known as an orchard. However,I must remember to edit my postings and not use words such as gearbox, bonnet, boot, dickey seat, petrol, motor, mudguard, tyre, windscreen, spanner etc. lest people become confused :-)
In Victorian Britain, especially in northern industrial towns, a man was employed to go to people's houses and wake them up by knocking on their bedroom window. If you were so wakened, you were 'knocked up'. This expression is still in use in some parts of the world but I have learned not to use it in the US! I also no longer refer to that handy little office gadget used to erase pencil written errors as a "rubber". People seem to get the wrong idea when I ask for one!


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Mark Gregush Portland Oregon on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 12:22 pm:

Ok I read it a second time, LOL, I got it.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By William L Vanderburg on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 01:23 pm:

What do they say if you ask for a Fag?


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Dick Lodge - St Louis MO on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 01:33 pm:

Over 20 years ago, a friend and I put together an old car rally with an English theme (we both had Austin sedans). One of the quiz questions was to identify the AmE name for a list of BrE car terms. I seem to recall that no one guessed what "wing piping" was. :-)


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Norman T. Kling on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 01:48 pm:

Here I grow Apples, Apricots, Peaches, Plums, Lemons, Grapefruit, Kumquats, Pomegranates, Grapes, Figs, and Dates all on the same acre. They all do well. When you are on a hillside, you get more frost down in the low areas and less in the high areas, so if you have a ravine on the property, put the apples low the stone fruits along the slopes, and the citrus and dates on top. Also have Boysenberries. It works. Do I have a grove or an orchard? I also have almonds, but those feed the birds and squirrels. I was able to retrieve one or two this season, but accidently swept up with a vacuum cleaner, so didn't get to eat it.
Norm


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Jem Bowkett on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 03:55 pm:

Dick, you had an Austin saloon. And I have a question about wing piping, but it's for my Model A so I'll take it to Ahooga or Fordbarn.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Fred Dimock, Newfields NH, USA on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 04:00 pm:

Norm -- You don't have a grove or orchard.
All you got is a bunch of fruity trees! :-)


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Dick Lodge - St Louis MO on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 04:33 pm:

Quite so, Jem, a 1936 Austin Ten Sherborne...


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Karl Gilchrist on Wednesday, November 13, 2013 - 05:25 pm:

Bob What part of Godzone? Karl


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert E. (Bob) Blackbourn, Gautier Ms. on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 10:10 am:

Oratia Valley Karl. Where I was raised is now over grown with houses! My school days friend rescued and moved the house and it is now a museum.
http://www.destination-waitakere.com/ACTIVITIES/oratiafolkmuseum/index.html


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Bud Holzschuh - Panama City, FL on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 10:21 am:

Bob

Please keep your Zealand expressions. Reminds me that the American way is not the only way! ;o)

Think I'll go get some milk and biscuits ....


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Mark Gregush Portland Oregon on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 10:46 am:

What do you want to know about wing piping? :-)
Or is it "done and dusted"?


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert E. (Bob) Blackbourn, Gautier Ms. on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 03:23 pm:

Bud, ask for serviette unless you are taking care of a baby :-)


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Mike Walker, NW AR on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 04:37 pm:

I asked a fellow from NZ who is doing some work in our house what wing piping means, and he had no idea. How long must we stay in the dark about this? The suspense is killing me!


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Jem Bowkett on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 04:57 pm:

Fender welt.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert E. (Bob) Blackbourn, Gautier Ms. on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 05:22 pm:

These days not too many people even know what fender welt is. Or ignition points either!


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Dick Lodge - St Louis MO on Friday, November 15, 2013 - 05:25 pm:

Jem beat me to it, Mike.


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