He passed today. The cancer took over his little body. His lungs filled with fluid and there was nothing anybody could do. I held him on my chest until he passed. He will be greatly missed. It's better this way, he's not suffering anymore.
Oh, so sorry Will, your family will remain in our prayers.
Please let's keep this a the top,
God speed little James,
West Point, Utah
Very hard to read this our prayers go to all of you, Bob
Prayers to James, you and the rest of your family Will.
I am so sorry!
I am so sorry. Our prayers are with you and your family.
The hardest thing in life is to out live your children and grand children. Praying for you and your family.
........My most sincere sympathy to you and your family.
At least you know everything possible was done for him.
God bless you and your family, Will. I know he fought hard, and you did your all for James.
I'm having trouble even typing i think Dean said everything!! Bud.
Very sorry to hear this. My condolences.
It makes me so sad, thinking of you and your family. How you must feel. You do know that all anybody could do, was done. We may never know why these things must be. It happens more than we like to believe.
Our hearts and thoughts and prayers continue to go out to you, your family, and James.
Wayne and Linda Sheldon
I am very sorry Will. Please know that I will pray for you and your family. May the Lord comfort you in your time of grief.
Our sympathies; he fought a good fight, but apparently there were other plans for him. Your family will be in our thoughts.
Linda & David Dewey
Loosing a child or grandchild has to be about the toughest part of life. I hope you are able to find some peace with friends & family.
I sincerely hoped this story might end differently. I'm not sure you can ever actually figure out "why". I guess one of the greatest accomplishments of James' short life was to bring so many people together. Perhaps there is a method in God's plan after all.
So sorry to hear that Will. James' voyage is elsewhere - you will need to wait to meet up with him again. Wishing you and your family peace and comfort in the meantime.
Words cannot convey how sorry we are Will. Hard to understand why, but the Good Lord has a reason and some day, we'll understand.
That is hard news to hear. Sorry about you and your family's loss.
Our thoughts a prayers are with you and your family.
Craig and Jean Stolpestad
I am so very sorry. You and your family will remain in my prayers. May his soul and all the souls of the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace.
So sorry. Its hard to lose a child.
My heart aches too. Such a valiant try at the end. Prayers with you and the family on this saga of a young life too soon passed.
I've been praying for you and your family. Words cannot express my deep sadness. My son said that his Sunday School teacher told him that when we lose a loved one here on earth, we gain an angel in heaven that watches over us.
May you take comfort in knowing that you have an angel to watch over you now.
Sending you love, hugs and support from our family to yours.
James is now with God,May God now comfort you and the rest of your Family
May God grant you peace,comfort and love at this most difficult time. I'm so saddened and sorry to hear this
We are very sorry for your loss.
You were a perfect grandfather.
We will continue to pray for you and your family.
My heart is broken, my faith is strong. I am praying for your families healing and understanding.
"Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. 2"In My Father's house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. 3"If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also."
I am so sorry Will. My prayers are with you and your family.
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I’m so thankful you were able to be there for James. He fought a good fight and I know you and so many others did all they could. And yes, I also believe James is now in a much better place. And for him the pain is over and the joy is just beginning . But for you and others who loved him much there is a huge loss in your lives.
When I lost my Dad and then later lost my Mom I found some things were helpful to me. They may not be of any use to you or perhaps one or two of them will help you through this time also.
Praying to Jesus -- for grace and strength.
Reading / reviewing the 5 stages of grief. It was good to remind myself that the large mood swings were normal -- even for a guy during times like this. Be sure to take time to grieve. I've been in the military and there were sometimes we couldn’t stop and take time to grieve -- you just have to push on because there was mission that has to be completed. But it has been documented that most of us go through some very predicable stages when we loose a loved one. If you are not familiar with those 5 stages of grief or if you would like a refresher -- please see: http://www.recover-from-grief.com/index.html or http://www.way2hope.org/5_stages_of_grief_and_loss.htm or one of the other web sites that describe those different stages. I know I went through them when I lost my Dad and again when I lost my Mom. It is just nice to know that our feelings are normal and we are not losing it. And while of each of us does that in a slightly different way all of us need to do it so in time we can move on with our lives.
And when you have some private time (I hate to cry in public) I found a song I wanted to share with you. It’s by Brad Paisley called “When I Get Where I am Going.” Even though it says “don’t cry for me down here” it’s really ok to get misty eyed – sometimes it expresses the way we really feel. And yes – there will be some sort of 30 second commercial for something at the beginning – but then the song starts. It does a good job of capturing that “bitter sweet” feeling and for me it was and still is helpful for processing my feelings. It is located at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYHT-TF4KO4 . And remember to “turn off the video at the end or at least hit replay” as sometimes the song that follows doesn’t fit in at all.
If I can be of any help – please drop me a note. We are praying that God will grant you and your family extra grace during this time.
Speechless. So sorry.
Will, words cannot express my deepest sympathy. We all thought he was on the road to recovery, as it turns out, he's on the road to Heaven instead. Prayers are with you all at this sorrowful time.
I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot even imagine the sorrow of losing James. May God be with you and your family during this incredibly difficult time. James is in Gods loving arms now. So very sorry.
God bless you and your family, Will. Prayers for healing and peace.
My heart breaks for you and your family. My prayers are with you all.
Will, losing our parents is the natural order of things. Losing a child or grandchild is not. My heart goes out to you and yours at this very difficult time. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
Will, I had been following your story for a long time and was hoping for a different outcome. What a brave young man. Our prayers are with you and your family.
And the wolf will dwell with the lamb, And the leopard will lie down with the kid, And the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; And a little boy will lead them.
Isaiah 11:6 NAS77
Indeed. A little boy, who most of us never met outside this forum, stirred men from around the world to pray, hope and encourage you and your family. He caused us to put down our tools and differences to consider what we value most. Will, your love for this little boy was evident in every word you wrote. Every one who dares to love deeply equally accepts the risk of grief. You dared to love James.
We will never experience your grief but we've wept with you. I sat with my 6 year-old grandson Connor on my lap the other night looking at the post-surgery pictures. Connor thought we should pray for James and for his Pop Pop so we did.Then he asked why I had tears in my eyes and I told him that is what Pop Pops do and hugged him until he asked me to let him go.
It is quite possible you and I will never meet this side of Heaven. Even if we do not I will still be able to tell folks about the Grandfather who showed great compassion, dignity and remarkable character in the most difficult of times. I would be privileged if you let me start that story with, "I have a friend..."
Connor and I will continue to pray for you and your family.
Will, I'm so sorry to hear the news about James. Be strong my friend.
My sympathy to you and your family.
My heart felt sorrow is with you.
Although this is my first post regarding your grandson, I have been following the story since you first broke the news of his health challenge on this forum.
I like many others can find no words that adequately convey my deepest condolences to you and your family.
My deepest sympathy to you and your family Will, you will continue to stay in our thoughts and prayers.
So sorry Will, I can't imagine what your going through.
I will continue to pray for you and the family. Very sad news, he is now in God's arms.
Will, I'm so sorry, you and your family will stay in our prayers. I can't imagine the loss.
Will, I can only imagine your pain. So sorry!
Will,there's nothing I can say that will lesson the pain of losing your grandson to cancer. Please take comfort in the fact that you have many, many friends here that would lesson that pain for you if they could. Both you and your extended family will remain in our hearts,thoughts and prayers in the coming days.
Words always fail me at times like this. I will never understand how this could happen to an innocent child. We will continue to keep you and your family in our prayers.
SO SO Sorry to hear! You and your family are in our prayers
Deepest sympathies to you and your family, rest in gods arms little James , still praying for you guys , so sorry .
My sincerest condolences. Will continue to pray for you and your family. I'm so sorry.
Will, very saddened to learn the news. My thoughts and prayers remain with you all.
So very sorry to hear of your family's tragic loss. GOD bless you all.
Poor little guy just couldn't catch a break. What an ordeal to go through for him and you all.
I am so sorry for your loss.
What can anyone really say other than what's already been said? Obviously, there's a bunch out here who really DO care... Thoughts and prayers are sent your way.
Will, I have no words. I can't imagine the pain. As Marv said, I can't say anything more than what has been said. Bless you all. Dave
Our hearts have been touched in many ways. Your grandson James was so perfect that god has made him an angel. With deepest sympathies on the passing of your grandson.
Condolences and strength to you and your family. I can't even begin to imagine the loss of a child or grandchild. The courage and strength it must have taken to hold him as he passed to a better place is unimaginable.
My deepest sympathy to you and your family. I'm glad that you were there for James.
Our sincerest condolences
Will, so sorry for your family and the loss of little James. Our hearts and prayers are with you. Your Model T friends.
Our deepest sympathies from our house to your families. We will continue to pray for your family during this time of great sadness. I can't imagine the grief you are feeling. May God grant you the strength to carry you on.
There are no words to ease your pain but the length of this thread speaks to the humanity in this community all of which are expressing heartfelt condolences. I hope you find some solace and comfort in knowing you have all of this support and love thinking of you and your family during this very trying time of your life.
I'm sorry. Your pain continues, but James' pain is over! I too have lost a grandson, so I understand. May God bless you and your family.
Thank you everyone, My wife and I are flying home in the morning. When I get back on my house coumpter I will share with everyone about the day
So sorry. Lean on each other....
I lost a baby daughter, you never forget the pain, but hang onto each other and move ahead. My deepest sympathy to you and your family. I'm glad that you were there for him....
I am so sorry.....I have no words to express my sorrow. Just know, that you and you family, are been not alone, and someone will always be there for you. James fought an incredible battle, for being so young, and he suffers no more. He is, in a better place, I'm sure...
So sorry Will, condolences to you and the family.
Too close to home, time helps, but he's always with you.
So very sorry to hear this terrible news.
Dear God, There is a little guy named James who should be showing up soon. He might look a little rough, he just lost to the "Big C". He left a lot of Model T friends he never knew he had, a great family, and a Model T Grandpa that misses him terribly. Do you think you could find a couple of temporary "Model T Grandpas" to fill in before his real grandpa gets there? I know there are a lot of them up there by now. And if you have any Model T cars up there, I am sure James would enjoy the ride, he was supposed to get with his grandpa here.
Just one more thing, if you could. Could you send a little sign to his grandpa, something only he will know, that lets him know James is OK?
Thanks for listening, and let James know that we will be OK too.
Will, I am very sorry for your loss.
My deepest condolences for you and your family's loss.
God Bless you and your family, sir. I can't think of any other words that will convey my deep sympathy.
Over the last several months, I eagerly awaited the latest update on your grandson and his gallant battle with cancer. I firmly believe God works in mysterious ways and we are incapable of fully understanding why such things happen.
I was so impressed and inspired with the numerous members of the Model T Forum who offered an outpouring of invaluable support and prayers to you, your family, and your grandson. You should take comfort in the knowledge that your grandson's illness inspired so many people to turn to God for support and guidance.
Last summer, my wife and I watched helplessly for several months while my son endured a heartbreaking custody battle involving my new grandson. For large periods of time, my mind was filled with fears, anxiety, confusion, and doubts as I pondered all of the "what ifs" that may or may not happen. At one particularly stressful moment during that lengthy ordeal when my mind was cluttered with doubts and fears, a sense of calm inexplicably descended upon me and the following line filled my head repeatedly for 30 seconds, "Trust in the Lord always and again I say rejoice. Trust in the Lord always and again I say rejoice." Over and over that line repeated itself through my head and it purged the doubts, fears, and anxiety from my mind. From that point forward, each time my mind began to race and fill with the doubts, anxiety, and fears, that line re-entered my mind and internal peace and calm was restored. In the end, things worked out just fine for my son and grandson.
I share that story with you in the hopes that as you and your family experience the predictable doubts, fears, and anxiety in the coming months, maybe you'll achieve some internal peace and comfort in the way that I did. When your mind is cluttered with fears and doubts, try to simply repeat: "Trust in the Lord always and again I say rejoice." God works in mysterious ways.
Peace be with you and your family and your grandson.
Will, best wishes and prayers for you and your family. There is no way I could comprehend your loss. I wish no one ever would have to, but these thing are not in our hands, but the Lord's. James is in his arms and experiencing the peace that passeth understanding. Please believe that hope springs eternal from the ashes of despair. God bless.
I am so sorry. My prayers are with you and your family.Remember he will always be with you.
Everyone, Im am back in Florida. Let me start with Im am not ok. Two weeks ago the doc's were confident that my grandson was on the mend. Then his little body started filling with fluid. His left lung collapsed again. A test of the fluid and it was full of cancer and now the cancer was attacking his brain. I noticed that he was getting sluggish. They did some kind of test and then told us there was nothing anyone could do. The only thing that was keeping him alive was his breathing machine. He was no longer able to breath on his own again. I told the doc that he was as strong as any 4 year old. When he would hold my hand the grip was strong. When I read him books he was with me with every page. The doc's told me that is was only the pain meds that kept him from screaming out. As a family we made the treble decision to let the doc pull the breathing tube from him. I stayed with James for the whole night. We sang and read book and watched the Good Dinosaur on TV. I held him for a while and for a couple of hours the nurses moved his hoses around so I could lay next to him in bed. On friday we all sat next to him. The nurses gave him more Morphine. At 11:45am the doc came in to remove the breathing machine. The nurses brought in a large rocking chair. My son asked me if I would hold James as the removed the tube from his body. My wife and I sat in the chair and my son and his wife were on each side. They handed me James and the tube came out. I sat there telling him about all the special times we had together. For just a slight moment I thought he gave a slight smile. As the monitor showed his heart rate slow I screamed out how much I loved him and then at 11:58am it was over. I held him for another 15 minutes and placed him in his bed and tucked him in the last time. As I'm typing this I am crying. I know he is in a better place but I miss him so much. As far as I go, I'm a mess. I cant get those last few moments out of my head. I woke up screaming last night. I don't have favorite grandchildren but James was the one that spent the most time with me. I made sure nothing or no one would ever harm him, But as hard as I tried I could not stop this thing that killed him. I prayed to god to take my life instead of his. I don't know why god choose to take my beautiful grandson from me but I'm sure that someday I will be with him again. There are so many things that I never got to teach him, You can bet when we are together again I'm going to start over. There is fishing, and tools and then I need to teach him about girls and of course old cars. I miss him so much it hurts. Everything I have done here in Florida was for my grandchildren. I even made sure the place we bought had a pool so James could go swimming. He loved the times I would FaceTime on the Iphone with him and we would chase the chickens.. I'm going to close now. Im sure it will get better in time but for now I'm a real mess. Thanks for everything guys, You're all part of my family.
I am so sorry for this deep loss and the pain upon you right now. I cannot imagine the hurt your family holds. God be with you.
Damn it Will.........you have me fighting back tears.
I'm a pretty stoic person which is requisite for being a church organist.
I have no idea how many funerals I played for over some 48 years including my Dads funeral.
I have learned that letting out grief is the best way to deal with it.
You will never regret sharing the ordeal with "friends" here.
Again.......my heartfelt sympathy.
Deepest sympathy from our family to yours. God will be with you and your family. Tim
So very sad. I am sorry for your loss.
Wish we could all kick in and each of us take some of that pain for you Will, but as you said yourself, in time, it will get better. What you must remind yourself Will, is that if James were here now, he would be telling his Mom something like,....."Mom, how can we cheer Grandpa up and make him feel better? I don't want Grandpa to be sad". Believe me Will,.....he would,.....
I lost my wife to cancer a few years ago and I think it would be even worse to lose a child or grandchild. I will tell you right now it is something you will never get over but in time God will teach you to learn to live with. It does get easier but right now you need to allow yourself to grieve. Cry, get mad, go into a room by yourself and scream. Whatever it takes. You will meet a lot of people who say it was meant to be or he is in a better place. Just ignore them, they mean well but unless you have been through it you do not have a clue. I will be praying for you and your family.
Forget holding back the tears. Let them flow.You must go through what you must to get through this. It will always hurt, always be a void in your heart and your soul. But it will get easier, and you do need to move on. For your family. For yourself. And for James. Because he would want you to.
Wayne and Linda
What Harold, Donald, and Wayne said. I couldn't say it any better. Dave
It wasn't God who took your grandson from you... it was He who gave him to you.
A big piece of you is gone, but in time, you'll find there's enough left of you to go on.
God bless you Will.
Thoughts and prayers for you Will.