OT, kinda. New Law Views-so true!

Topics Last Day Last Week Tree View    Getting Started Formatting Troubleshooting Program Credits    New Messages Keyword Search Contact Moderators Edit Profile Administration
Model T Ford Forum: Forum 2017: OT, kinda. New Law Views-so true!
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Bob Bishop, San Diego on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 02:11 pm:

1 . Law of Mechanical Repair -
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity
- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least _ accessible place in the universe.

3. Law of Probability
- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers
- If you dial_a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.


5. Variation Law
- If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.


6. Law of the Bath
- When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.


7. Law of Close Encounters

- The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

8. Law of the Result
- When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!


9. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.


10 . Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.


11. The Coffee Law
- As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.


12. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.


13. Law of Physical Surfaces -

The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.


14. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.


15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.


16. Law of Public Speaking - A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!


17. Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it! (like Rye-Krisp)


18. Doctors' Law
- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.




If you don't forward this to your friends, your belly button will unscrew. Really... It's true.
I read it on the Internet!


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Robert G. Hester Jr., Riverview, FL on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 03:53 pm:

If your belly button unscrews your butt will fall off. Also, if your pituitary gland tears up you can't go "Patooie" any more.

You done good, Bob, but you left off number 19, you can drive with your low beams for miles and miles, but when you turn on your high beams oncoming traffic will instantly appear.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Gary Schreiber- Santa Isabel Ecuador on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 04:07 pm:

Yup, yup, yup 18 times +1 :-)


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By R.V. Anderson on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 04:29 pm:

Bob, the Swedes out here have genuine imported Rye-Krisp stacked three feet high on the shelves. We'll send you some.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By RICHARD GRZEGOROWICZ on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 04:41 pm:

YOU BETCHA, STANDING AT THE BENCH WHAT EVER IS DROP'D HIT,S THE TOE OF MY BOOT , THERE IS A SHELF AT THE BOTTOM ABOUT 6 INCH'S OFF THE FLOOR YUP AND MANY THINGS ARE NOT MAGNETIC. AND ONE OF A WHEN I PULL THAT BENCH AWAY FROM THE WALL. NOW THIS COST ME 35.00 THE CAM GEAR JUMPED OUT OF MY FINGERS HIT MY TOE AGAIN.MY SHOP IS 490X60 AND LIKE ALL SHOPS THERE ARE THINGS..WELL TO THIS DAY ITS STILL SOMEWHERE ON THAT FLOOR [I THINK] ITS A BOSCH GEAR.THANK YOU BOB FOR REMINDING ME.GREG.


Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Fred Dimock, Newfields NH, USA on Thursday, April 13, 2017 - 07:34 pm:

You forgot to mention the law that something as funny as this will present itself just after I fill my mouth with wine and and I'll soil my shirt.


Add a Message


This is a private posting area. Only registered users and moderators may post messages here.
Username:  
Password:

Topics Last Day Last Week Tree View    Getting Started Formatting Troubleshooting Program Credits    New Messages Keyword Search Contact Moderators Edit Profile Administration