You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
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Topic author - Posts: 161
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 6:41 pm
- First Name: Bob
- Last Name: Coiro
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1915 Touring
- Location: Commack, NY
- Board Member Since: 2009
You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
Once upon a time, a long, long time ago, I posted a want ad in the antique car classifieds. See, I was shopping around for a Brass Model T Ford, something I'd wanted since I was a kid. Well, middle age hit, my daughter was grown up and with the credit cards mostly paid off, it was time to pull the trigger.
So I placed the ad in the classifieds and got some very interesting scam telephone calls:
The funniest one was the guy who phoned me and claimed to have a 1914 Model T Ford touring car for sale.
I said, "1914, huh? So I guess we're talkin' gas lamps."
"Oh, yeah, definitely gas lamps. Matter of fact, I just today finished hooking them up to the fuel pump."
I knew I had a live one on the line, so I suppressed a chuckle and asked a few more questions that any Model T owner would have understood.
"What kind of transmission do you have in that thing?"
"It's a stick. They didn't have automatics back then."
"Do tell."
And when asked about Rocky Mountain Brakes, he seemed to feel they were designed for very hilly terrain. I was further advised that a two-man top was only big enough for a roadster; the touring cars, like his, having four-man tops (You can't this stuff up). But by the time I got around to asking him about whether his car had a "Fat Man Wheel," he seemed to realize the jig was up. Maybe I could have kept him on the snipe hunt a little longer had I instead inquired about his hog's head. These guys have absolutely no sense of humor when they realize how long ago the tables turned on them.
So I placed the ad in the classifieds and got some very interesting scam telephone calls:
The funniest one was the guy who phoned me and claimed to have a 1914 Model T Ford touring car for sale.
I said, "1914, huh? So I guess we're talkin' gas lamps."
"Oh, yeah, definitely gas lamps. Matter of fact, I just today finished hooking them up to the fuel pump."
I knew I had a live one on the line, so I suppressed a chuckle and asked a few more questions that any Model T owner would have understood.
"What kind of transmission do you have in that thing?"
"It's a stick. They didn't have automatics back then."
"Do tell."
And when asked about Rocky Mountain Brakes, he seemed to feel they were designed for very hilly terrain. I was further advised that a two-man top was only big enough for a roadster; the touring cars, like his, having four-man tops (You can't this stuff up). But by the time I got around to asking him about whether his car had a "Fat Man Wheel," he seemed to realize the jig was up. Maybe I could have kept him on the snipe hunt a little longer had I instead inquired about his hog's head. These guys have absolutely no sense of humor when they realize how long ago the tables turned on them.
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- Posts: 177
- Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2019 10:21 am
- First Name: John
- Last Name: Dow
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1923 Touring
- Location: Leawood, Ks
- MTFCA Number: 32344
- Board Member Since: 2015
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
I was once asked by a lady while filling my '23 with gas: "How many cranks does it take to go a mile". I was speechless.
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- Posts: 1355
- Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2019 3:54 pm
- First Name: Kevin
- Last Name: Pharis
- Location: Sacramento CA
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
As the story goes...
A fella was gassing up his TT on the way to the dump with a full load. An onlooker asked where he was goin...? To the dump! Sooooo... how ya gonna get home...?!
A fella was gassing up his TT on the way to the dump with a full load. An onlooker asked where he was goin...? To the dump! Sooooo... how ya gonna get home...?!
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- Posts: 490
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 11:14 am
- First Name: Henry
- Last Name: Petrino
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1918 TT
- Location: Modesto, CA
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
I visited a local fruit stand a number of of times in the TT. One day I stopped in driving a modern car. The young lady who runs the place looked at me then smiled in recognition saying, "You're the guy with the old truck you have to wind up!"
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- Posts: 193
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 11:15 am
- First Name: Mike
- Last Name: Spaziano
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1926 Touring
- Location: Bellflower, California
- MTFCA Number: 21699
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
A few times, on different occasions, I've stopped at the gas station to fill up the '26 Touring.
Once I was asked "Is that one of those kit cars?" That person adsolutely could not believe that my car was built in 1926, not 1976 and wasn't made from fiberglass.
And on another occasion, in a panicked tone, a fellow patron exclaimed "You're not going to put ULEADED GAS in that, are you?" I replied "What am I supposed to put in it then?" I explained that the unleaded gas I was about to put in my car was far better than the gas that was available when my car was new.
One Wednesday evening I decided to cruise the local burger joint and join the drive thru line with the Roadrunners and the lead sleads. When I got to the end, I had to stop before I drove out onto the boulevard. While I was waiting for the traffic to pass, some joker standing on the right side of the car popped off with the line "Knott's Berry Farm is that way" pointing to the Southeast. I just looked at him and replied "Better stand back, I'm gonna light 'em up". That really got a laugh from the crowd and a couple of thumbs up.
Once I was asked "Is that one of those kit cars?" That person adsolutely could not believe that my car was built in 1926, not 1976 and wasn't made from fiberglass.
And on another occasion, in a panicked tone, a fellow patron exclaimed "You're not going to put ULEADED GAS in that, are you?" I replied "What am I supposed to put in it then?" I explained that the unleaded gas I was about to put in my car was far better than the gas that was available when my car was new.
One Wednesday evening I decided to cruise the local burger joint and join the drive thru line with the Roadrunners and the lead sleads. When I got to the end, I had to stop before I drove out onto the boulevard. While I was waiting for the traffic to pass, some joker standing on the right side of the car popped off with the line "Knott's Berry Farm is that way" pointing to the Southeast. I just looked at him and replied "Better stand back, I'm gonna light 'em up". That really got a laugh from the crowd and a couple of thumbs up.
Knowledge that isn't shared, is wasted knowledge.
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- Posts: 1518
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 12:28 pm
- First Name: Duane
- Last Name: Cooley
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 18 Runabout, 24 Runabout for 20yrs, 25 TT, late Center Door project, open express pickup
- Location: central MN
- MTFCA Number: 32488
- Board Member Since: 2015
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
Been missing out on a fun thread!
When I've been out over the years, thankfully, the folks weren't as.... uninformed.
Since I lost my mind mind, I feel more liberated
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- Posts: 203
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 11:09 am
- First Name: Charlie
- Last Name: Gagel
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 12 Tourings(2),14 Tourings(2),15 Touring,22Touring,22 TT,21 Fire Truck,14 Chief Car
- Location: Orange, CT
- MTFCA Number: 8377
- MTFCA Life Member: YES
- MTFCI Number: 22437
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
I took my wife and daughters out for ice cream one evening, and two elderly women passed our T and asked if I drove it there...
"NOPE, the kids pushed it here, and they are going to push us home when they finish their ice cream"
"NOPE, the kids pushed it here, and they are going to push us home when they finish their ice cream"
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- Posts: 521
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 12:42 pm
- First Name: David
- Last Name: Dewey
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1916 touring, 1925 runaboaut, 1926 Tudor
- Location: Oroville, CA
- MTFCI Number: 19936
- Board Member Since: 1999
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
The “how are you gonna get back from the dump “ storY really happened to Erich Barrett. If she seen his TV you could understand that!
T'ake care,
David Dewey
David Dewey
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- Posts: 521
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 12:42 pm
- First Name: David
- Last Name: Dewey
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1916 touring, 1925 runaboaut, 1926 Tudor
- Location: Oroville, CA
- MTFCI Number: 19936
- Board Member Since: 1999
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
Auto correct Strikes again “If you’ve seen his TT you would understand why the question!!”
T'ake care,
David Dewey
David Dewey
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- Posts: 1045
- Joined: Sat Apr 13, 2019 6:06 pm
- First Name: Susanne
- Last Name: Rohner
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: Late '15 touring, "Angel".
- Location: Valfabbrica, (central) Italy
- MTFCA Number: 464
- MTFCA Life Member: YES
- Board Member Since: 1999
- Contact:
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
On my way home one afternoon, stopped to get gas... Rather good looking guy walks over, making all kinds of small talk (like "want to go out for a drink" small talk), wants for me to take him for a ride... The car (somehow) wouldn't start... I was a little perplexed...
Anyway, I'm trying to figure how to get the car to start when this woman opens the door of her station wagon (with 3 kids in the back seat) and says "Honey, hurry up, we need to get home"... He turned about 3 shades of red, said he had to go, maybe next time...
As soon as "Pops McHubby" walked back toward his wife, kids, and station wagon, the car fired right up. And that's how she got the nickname "Angel"...
Anyway, I'm trying to figure how to get the car to start when this woman opens the door of her station wagon (with 3 kids in the back seat) and says "Honey, hurry up, we need to get home"... He turned about 3 shades of red, said he had to go, maybe next time...
As soon as "Pops McHubby" walked back toward his wife, kids, and station wagon, the car fired right up. And that's how she got the nickname "Angel"...
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- Posts: 490
- Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2019 11:14 am
- First Name: Henry
- Last Name: Petrino
- * REQUIRED* Type and Year of Model Ts owned: 1918 TT
- Location: Modesto, CA
Re: You Can't Make This Stuff Up.
Susanne,
Your story reminds me of another:
My youngest son, at the time about 18, was not a fan of the TT. In fact, he didn't like it at all (a fact that's since changed). One Saturday morning I needed materials for a backyard project. My modern truck was in the shop, so I asked him to come along in the TT to get the needed items. He groaned, but climbed in and off we went. I said to him, "Stop complaining. This truck is a babe magnet!" He wasn't convinced.
We arrived, parked, and went in for the needed lumber and things. After checking out, we pushed the cart out to the TT and began loading. About that time an absolutely gorgeous young woman around his age walked by. She looked at him, gave him a huge smile and said, "I love your truck!"
On the trip home I said simply, "See?" It couldn't have ben better if I had arranged it in advance.
Your story reminds me of another:
My youngest son, at the time about 18, was not a fan of the TT. In fact, he didn't like it at all (a fact that's since changed). One Saturday morning I needed materials for a backyard project. My modern truck was in the shop, so I asked him to come along in the TT to get the needed items. He groaned, but climbed in and off we went. I said to him, "Stop complaining. This truck is a babe magnet!" He wasn't convinced.
We arrived, parked, and went in for the needed lumber and things. After checking out, we pushed the cart out to the TT and began loading. About that time an absolutely gorgeous young woman around his age walked by. She looked at him, gave him a huge smile and said, "I love your truck!"
On the trip home I said simply, "See?" It couldn't have ben better if I had arranged it in advance.